A Classic Story
Once upon a time there was a little girl, she always wore a Red Riding Hood and all the people who knew her thought she looked pretty weird. She worked in a little pastry shop downtown the magic forest with the Muffin Man and the Seven Dwarfs. Business was bad because of the Hansel and Gretel Hut that was the leader of the cookie market. So Red decided to go in the “up the mountain” state were her creepy grandma/boss lived. The girl convinced her friend... The Short Prince Charming… to come with her and this is how the story begins.
-So, where are we going? Short prince asked…
-To my grandma’s house, I have a score to settle with her. She stays ala day up there when what she should do is taking care of the family business! When I get my hands on her I’ll ……
-uuu… and what do you have in that basket??
-An U.Z.I, no, just kidding … some liquor for grandma and some makeup and clothes for me. A girl is got to be prepared.
Prince opens his mouth to replay but the “up the mountain” buss pulls up in front of them and they hurry to get in. Half the way, there busses is stopped for custom check, because you see, illegal stuff must not pass between the “Magic Forest” state and the “Up the mountain” state. So they make their way to the door when a small midget with a shaggy hairdo bumps in to Red. He says “excuse me” and moves one. Prince and Red just got of the buss when they see a camera crew and a talking donkey standing in front of the microphone and saying something about some illegal mushrooms. The elf’s bored patrol calls Red over.
-Hello, the girl with the red Hood on her head… step this way please.
-Is there a problem officer??
-Nothing, just a routine check.
After a few moments “Prince” sees that the border officers around Red are starting to get anxious then she points at him… one of the elves comes over and starts to speak
-Good morning Mr.… he looks in prince’s magic scroll... Mr. charming, are you aware of any illegal drugs that your companion might carry??
-No, he replayed, besides the liqueur, no!
-I am afraid you have to come with us, down to the magic downtown police station.
They show him the way to the flying pumpkin that was parked nearby and stuff him and Red inside… on the way he Try’s to find out what is going one
-What in bloody hell is going one, Red?? Are you on drugs??
-No, I am sober for a year now! I don’t know how the mushrooms got in to my pocket…
The pumpkin is slowly but surely going to the magic forest police station. After thirty minutes they arrive at the station where they are put in different interrogation chambers. In Red’s room enters a big birded man, with red checks and a big smile...
-Ho, ho, ho. You’re busted! Say’s the big man, laughing.
-I didn’t do anything, Red replays, and those weren’t my drugs... A midget put them there, it’s not my fault!
-Better confess now or you will get to prison with the big black bears and the golden wishing fishes.
-I didn’t do it, why don’t you understand?
-Well, I understand you are a very naughty girl and because it’s your first crime you will go to my toys factory to work there for two years.
After finishing the sentence, the big, jolly guy puts down the pen he was writing with on her transfer forms, like when a surgeon puts his surgical knife down after he had realized that the patient died while he was operating.
After a couple of minutes Red and Prince meet again in the waiting cell so called because the inmates wait there the caring out of their sentence. Red starts to speak:
-O, Prince, we are in big trouble now... how will we get out of this one, this is the most embarrassing moment of my life…
-Actually, remember that time when you got drunk and... Red stops him before he could finish what he had to say.
-So, how much did you get?
-Two years in the toys factory for complicity. How about you?
-One year, same location.
-Toys R Us factory doesn’t seam so bad, the helpers work there.
-Maybe your right!
They didn’t know how wrong they ware!
As they woke up next morning they were taken to the Toys Factory, this time in a ginger bread car, when they got there, they met the warden; a 20 feet tall giant ho liked bossing people around. The only thought in their minds was escaping.
The factory was an old building full of weird smelling objects.
Red was assigned to the Wooden Toys department and Prince in the high teak department... The factory was in business 364 or 365 days per year so there was a lot of work to do. They didn’t even have the time to nap because story characters can go days without sleep… In the cafeteria Red and Prince are planning their escape:
-So, what are we going to do? Asks Prince
-I thought you’d have a plan by now... beats me!
-I could try to talk them to let you come with me in to the forest when I am send to gather wood and when we get there try to make a run for it…
-Good idea! But what about the guard? He’s always watching us!
-I will take care of him. Says Red, winking.
So the next day when they were sent to gather wood, little Riding hood (ho was 18 so that I don’t get sued) approached the guard and said:
-Hi, guard, what would you say if I told you … you ware cute and I have some free time.
-Really?? Says the guard, blushing.
-Really! Come with me… she is walking towards the forest entry
Meanwhile Prince is sneaking behind the guard...
-Kiss me, says Red … the tall guard bends over
And bam! Prince snaps him in the back of his head with a tree ranch. The guard falls down like a leaf; tide up with 1 tone weights.
-He’s out!!!Screams of joy Red
-Let’s head deep in to the forest! They can’t find us there.
They go deeper and deeper in to the black forest, night is setting and they are cold. As the sky’s turn black Prince starts to complain:
-I was born royalty, my place is not here, what was I thinking coming here with you, I could be home drinking a cup of tea, watching the magic mirror, I bet there is a good show on...
-I beat we are the show on replays Red. Don’t worry we will get to grandma’s house and this will all be over soon.
-Soon!?!? Don’t talk to me about bloody soon; we were supposed to be there weeks ago!
-I don’t see why you are so grumpy, it’s not like it’s my fault… if you had a vehicle… like a car or a pumpkin or something… we wouldn’t be in this situation at all...
-You’ve got to be kidding me, you are blaming me?? That’s it! I am taking the road to civilization... bye!
-BYE!
Saying that, Prince left Red to walk on her one and disappeared in to the forest night…. Hours later Red heard some barking sound in the background...” it must be the search Werewolves” an man like creature who’s only goal is to find and catch the escapes from the toy factory, she saw them one time when she was cleaning the workshop. She hears them louder as they come closer and closer … she start’s to run but her clothes are clothing in the lower branches of the trees. She takes of her Red hood thinking that is slowing her down, she puts it in the pocket and runs … but with no use... The werewolves surround her; they have big teats and big claws. She start’s to try to reasoning with them... Like anyone would do...
-Nice wolves... nice, nice wolves... what big claws do you have. The werewolves are getting closer
-And what big scary red eyes do you have. The first one, the leader of the pack starts hauling. They are prepared to attach her.
-What big, big, big mouth do you have! O my good! She tries to run but the leader jumps to grab her, he quickly returns to the ground in flames. He was hit by a ranch. Its prince!?! He’s holding a flaming tree ranch in his right hand. The werewolves run frighten when they see their leader down. Prince walks towards Red.
-Are you ok? Close one huh??
-Good thing I’ve showed up, I was close to becoming dog food... Where did you get the fire??
-From your grandmas stove, she leaves minutes from here.
They start again walking to grandma’s house again... in a few minutes they get there and grandma fixes them a warm dinner.
-Kids, you have been through a lot, I am sorry that I didn’t get that bottle of liquor but well … you have to quite sometime... I called some of my friends at the elf police station and they redraw the charges on you guys...
-So now will you come with us to the city and take care of the family business grandma??
-No, my place is here but you have proven to deserve it... I leave you in charge of it. She bends and whispers in to Red‘s ear, Prince is a good boy, don’t lose him!
And they lived happily ever after or at list until the next assignment J
;)) geniala...cocktail de povesti...adica de ce sa le mai citeasca copilul pe toate...:-?? :P
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